I've been so undisciplined lately. I've been procrastinating, I haven't been doing my hobbies, and I just haven't been showing up for myself. I have dreams and goals to fulfill and I haven't been showing up and working towards them. even when I have free time, like today, I just get into bed, scroll, watch videos, and not do what I should be doing. writing my book, going out for a run, eating good, practing, etc. only she outsiders are involved, eg school, do I actually force myself to get up and work. even worse, I've started putting my value in school, and marks, and how friends and others view me. that's not good. I just need to get up and find myself again. go back to libraries, go back to volunteering, go back to trying to be the best version of me. I hate this version of myself because it's only going to bring regret later on.