Who would’ve thought you’d feel a sense of desolation even in moments of supposed joy? As if I’m expecting something heart-wrenching to happen someday. I’m trying not to be patient with the wrong things; I really am. It’s just that… I’m waiting—waiting for this prelude to lead to something worse. Well, what exactly am I waiting for? I’m waiting for the day you get tired of me. Tired of my nonsense and my mood swings. That someday you’ll leave me because I am no longer worthy of the love and affection you embrace me with. It’s honestly one of my biggest fears. That one day, you’ll suddenly keep your distance and become out of reach. That I’ll become unlovable in your eyes. You’ll no longer tolerate the way my pessimistic mind works and how I constantly need reassurance that everything will be okay. The day you’ll lose your patience and choose someone else. You’ll say I’m too problematic and will stop trying to understand my complex being. The day my flaws will disgust you, my once admirable features turned bare. You'll soon realize my depravity and see that I am not the same person as I appear to be to others. I wait. I wait. I wait. "I wait for the day when you finally say You're out of love with me." — Laufey – ms. kae 09.06.26 note: this piece is just inspired by Laufey's song and is not a personal experience (⁠*⁠＾⁠3⁠＾⁠)⁠/⁠～⁠♡