Picture this: 2018. I’m 13 years old, just a kid with a PS3 that sounded like a jet engine, but I loved that thing with my whole heart. Games were ridiculously cheap back then, so one day I’m scrolling through a second-hand shop and there it is: Red Dead Redemption. My brain immediately goes, “Perfect. I’ll play this, get hyped, and when the second one drops, I’ll be ready.” The hype for RDR2 was unreal. Theories everywhere, leaks, people losing their minds over trailers. I was consuming all of it. Living and breathing cowboys. So I played for hours and hours as John Marston, feeling cool, feeling unstoppable. Like yeah, I’m a cowgirl. Watch me ride. Then reality hit. A few weeks before release, I saw it online: Red Dead Redemption 2 was a PS4 exclusive. I didn’t have a PS4. I had my loud, loyal PS3 that suddenly felt ancient. The disappointment was huge. So I did what any dramatic 13-year-old would do. I buried that love deep down and pretended I didn’t care. ⊹　 ︶︶　 ୨୧　 ︶︶　 ⊹ Fast forward. I got a PS4 about four years ago, but somehow I completely forgot about RDR2. Not once did it cross my mind. Until December. My friend would not shut up about it. “You have to play it. It’s beautiful. Actually beautiful. The story? Insane. Arthur? Bro. Arthur.” He kept going and somewhere in the middle of all that, something clicked. You know that feeling when you just know you’re about to fall in love with a game? December 31st. New Year’s Eve. Everyone’s getting ready for midnight. Me? I’m downloading RDR2. I told myself I’d just try it for a bit. Next thing I know, it’s 5 a.m. The new year came and went while I was stuck in the mountains, snow everywhere, following some guy named Dutch and this other dude… Arthur. I didn’t even hear the fireworks. ⊹　 ︶︶　 ୨୧　 ︶︶　 ⊹ Months later, 160+ hours in, I finished Arthur’s story today. And I sobbed. Not just teary-eyed. I mean full-on ugly crying. The kind where you can’t breathe and your face is a mess. It felt like my heart got ripped out, stomped on, and somehow put back bigger than before. Now I’m on John’s part, which will probably be a 10/10 too. But let’s talk about Arthur. The beautiful thing about this game is that everyone’s Arthur is different. Same character, same fate, but the little choices make him yours. I’m obsessed with watching TikToks and gameplay videos just to see how other people play him. My Arthur? High honor. Always. From day one. He absolutely hates driving carriages and is terrible at it, trees just appear out of nowhere, okay? Not his fault. He has long hair, always. It’s a whole vibe. And the Bayou near Saint Denis, with the gators and the fog and those creepy sounds? He avoids it like the plague. So do I. Too many alligators. Absolutely not. He’s the one who stopped on every hill to watch the sunset. The one who said “hey there, partner” to everyone in Valentine. The one who tried so hard to be good, even when everything around him was falling apart. That’s my guy. ⊹　 ︶︶　 ୨୧　 ︶︶　 ⊹ What can I even say without ruining it? It’s stunning. Not just the graphics, though those sunsets deserve awards, but everything else too. The story made me feel everything. Anger, joy, grief, pure laughter. One minute I was cracking up, the next I was fighting tears. There were so many small moments that just made me smile like an idiot at the screen. The side characters are incredible. Some make you want to hug them. Some make you want to punch them. Both reactions are completely valid. Exploring never feels boring because there’s always some random events for you. Even hunting, which I thought would feel like a chore, turned out to be weirdly calming. Will I 100% it? Probably not. It’s a lot. But honestly, it doesn’t matter. I finally understand why people say this game changed them. ⊹　 ︶︶　 ୨୧　 ︶︶　 ⊹ I’m kind of silly. At least I think so. But I’m also depressed a lot of the time. Most days, if I’m being honest. The moments when I actually feel like I’m enough are rare. Really rare. But spending 160 hours with Arthur changed something in me. Watching him struggle. Watching him fall. Watching him get back up. Watching him love his people and try so hard to be better, even when everything was collapsing around him. Something clicked. If he could try, even when he was scared and hurting, maybe I can too. Maybe I deserve to believe in myself. Maybe it’s okay to cry, to mess up, to feel lost, as long as I keep trying. Like Arthur did. Below this you’ll find pictures of my gameplay and my Arthur. Oh Arthur… the man you are! 😌🙏