the absolute horror of becoming self-aware is that you lose the right to be a victim in your own life. you are sitting there, sobbing on the floor, but you’re also standing across the room watching yourself do it, completely aware of every choice that led you there. you can’t even have a good, clean tragedy anymore because you are always the accomplice. That's why I believe you should study what makes yourself. Even though self awareness comes with downsides (as mentioned above) you should always study yourself. Study what makes you open and what makes you defensive. The topic you avoid, the joke that irritates you, the question that feels insulting, the feedback you instantly reject; analyse it. Defensiveness is usually the guard dog sitting in front of a weakness you have not trained yourself to face.