I know it’s conflicting, especially since I gave it a perfect score, but yeah, I hate it. ​Call me too young to understand things, but I wouldn't hesitate to choose the person I truly love, even if that meant ending up alone. ​Sure, she loved them in different ways. How could she not? Who can even love different people the exact same way? You can’t even maintain that so-called "impartial" love among your own kids (or among your closest loved ones, if you don't have children). ​Nonetheless, it was love—simple as that. That's why I was so proud of her when she FIRST made the FINAL decision to walk away from both of them and live out her eternity on her own. ​But what happened next? She kept getting swayed back and forth, that I, who trusted her narrative about loving these two perfect men (who even realized they were too good for her, lol), eventually came to a realization that if there's one person she truly loved the most, it was HERSELF. I know we’re supposed to advocate for self-love, but not at the expense of hurting everyone around you. ​Besides, there’s no such thing as a definitive "first" or "last" love. How can you even tell which is which? ​"I really do love you," she says, yet she still leaves the person she chose to share eternity with. She talked about her love with Luke as a young, undeveloped love that never had the chance to grow—and while that's essentially true, I don't buy that she actually built a deep, fulfilling connection with the man she spent 65 years with, either. ​If she had, Larry wouldn't have spent his whole life feeling like she didn't love him as much as or more than Luke. Even after death, he was left wondering why she chose him in the first place and whether she ever truly loved him at all. ​It wasn't even a misunderstanding, as even her family and Karen, her dear friend, never understood why. She never once voiced to the world how much she loved him. Instead, she let him carry the weight of constant comparisons while he gave her the best life and afterlife tailored to her tastes. He knew her best, yet I honestly doubt she ever realized just how great of a man he was (and yes, I stand by this, even after watching how she chose him in the end). Gosh, I'm so stressed out. I thought it was going to be some kind of thriller or whatever. I never knew it would scratch my head and make me perform mental gymnastics until now. I saw it recommended on Reddit, and here I am, too cowardly to post my actual thoughts over there, rambling in what was supposed to be my private journal.

Now, I can no longer deny that I relate to the protagonist. His experiences and justifications for his deeds echo my own in similar shapes and hues. I don't know exactly how I feel about this horrid discovery. I think I should do something about it, but it's too complex of a puzzle. I don't even have the time and energy to fully comprehend it.

It was a brilliant movie, though I understand why it might not appeal to everyone. To cite a few reasons: the raw plot is deeply historical, sprinkled with jargon here and there, functions as an autobiography on some level, and features a main character most of us cannot relate to or root for. I haven't done any research yet, so I cannot confirm if the most important details in the movie are historically accurate. As far as I know, the director himself stated that this was neither a strictly historical nor an autobiographical movie, meaning some information were tweaked or added for creative purposes. Because of that, I can only really focus on the main character's personality. Dr. Oppenheimer never claimed to be, nor did he act like, a morally good person—not to his family, in his professional relationships, or even to himself. The film practically shows us his journey of inventing a literal bomb that could wipe us all out. Him, as well as the people who supported him and his creation, I'd say they were all evil. Despite their high intelligence, they were fools. Someone even mentions in the movie that Dr. Oppenheimer is a person who has seen so much, which begs the question: why was he so blind? I have a lot more to say, but this is getting longer than I planned. On a side note, since I wasn't familiar with Dr. Oppenheimer before this (none of the history books I’ve read even mentioned his name), seeing other scientists I actually recognize felt like a series of cameos. It reminded me of K-dramas that bring in popular actors for quick guest appearances. Nonetheless, personally, it was a good movie. I also just want to add: despite Dr. Oppenheimer not seeing how the bombs fell on the cities firsthand, the tragedy was imagined and replayed over and over again in his mind, which I believe shows that he had experienced getting killed by his own creation time and again. Even while he was going through that mental torment, he was still being warmly received and cheered by his peers, the higher-ups, and whatnot—knowing why because it was already preempted by Albert Einstein, created even more internal conflict, as he had to pretend he naively thought those gestures were genuinely for him and that he should be grateful. From the very first hints of Dr. Oppenheimer's moral compass gouging into the depths of his guilt, he was forced to experience the same outcome in his professional life—exactly what Albert Einstein had experienced, and what he prophesied Dr. Oppenheimer's life would become. Except his burden was even heavier than Albert's, since he is practically the "destroyer of worlds."

Szn 1 done! I knew it! The Grim Reaper isn't dead! ＼(^-^)／

Sure, there were some plotholes, but it was kinda saved for me by Mr. Lawyer and the engineer mole. Man, I replayed most of the mole's scenes. Def loved his role, especially after finding out it was his acting debut, and he's a rapper at that! Respect. Gonna camp for season 3 (*￣∇￣)ノ

So good! I didn't really expect them to completely break away from all the customs. I thought they would at least compromise? Especially since it's so difficult and you literally risk being branded as an outcast in your own society. Also, I just love Sherlock. I feel like our overall attitudes toward people are pretty alike. Despite being lukewarm and even apprehensive to some, we both still find ways to connect with others, friends, and loved ones by offering our sincerity and genuineness. And the editing, wow. That’s what got me attached to the first movie. Though it did give me that toxic thought of "I can do that too" geez Σ(￣□￣Ⅲ)